We ALL need to feel valued and HEARD.
I am thinking right now of conflict within families or work groups, people who have a reason to find a solution that is fair so that relationships are strengthened rather than torn apart when people think they have conflicting interests. Of course, when nations dialogue, their true interests are also better met with dialogue than with posturing and demands.
No one wins when a “solution” is “shoved down their throat.” That is no solution. Resentments will fester, more conflicts will arise and if they are not resolved fairly, the level of trust and joy in family or the workplace, and the level of cooperation, will deteriorate and the family unit or the work unit will be unable to function in any kind of healthy way.
You have to keep in mind that the RELATIONSHIPS are more important than the item you are squabbling over. When you sit down to dialogue, each person being free (and skilled) to express their true needs, it is very possible to find a compromise that BUILDS instead of DESTROYS trust in the other person or party.
I would suggest you check out “nonviolent communication techniques” if you need to build your skills in dialogue. We can all use a brush-up. If you get stuck in a conflict that seems unresolvable, perhaps you can find a facilitator with this training to help you out. I have used them numerous times with great success.
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